I love sunny days. I hate sunny days...
Here is how my emotions went today:
Woke up - I'm gonna be productive today, I can see the sun is shining. I have the groceries coming and I'm going to clean the kitchen before they get here.
Started to clean - Look at how productive I'm being. He would be so proud of me to see how nice the kitchen looks. I think I'll clean some of the living room, too. Go me!
Groceries are delivered - This is so great! I'm so clever for discovering this. I'm going to do it every week. It's so nice to have food in the fridge.
Left for Capoeira - Look at me being all independent. I feel good. I can keep myself busy while he's gone no problem.
Stopping at the craft store on my way to Capoeira - (mini crash) gosh look at all the cute stuff. I want to make something for a baby. Babies... man, I am so ready to have a baby. I really want to start a family with him. I don't care, we'll figure it out... oh wait.. no can't do that. I'd have to pack up everything and move and I can't even do that until after he gets back from this underway. Then I'd have to give notice at work. By the time I can move up there we'd have only a little over a year before he's out of the Navy. Why would I leave my job and dance when he'll be back in just over a year. Well crap, I guess I have to wait. Now I'm frustrated, and kinda sad.
At Capoeria - Wee this is so much fun and I'm going to get in such good shape. He'll be so surprised when he gets back and see's all the things I've learned in this class!
Leaving Capoeria - CRASH AND BURN!!! Hmm, I don't really want to go home to my empty apartment. And look at what an awesome sunny day it is. I wish he was here to do something in this awesome sunshine. We'd go running, or hiking, or biking, or something. We'd do something outside, together! Man, I hate sunny days. :( I guess I'll just go back to the apartment, alone... and eat some of that food that I just had delivered. I've got nothing else to do anyway. I am sad. And lonely. Stupid sunny day.
Ok, ok I still love a sunny day. In general it picks up my spirits, but MAN does it really make me miss having my mister around. So, here I sit, drinking my "tactical post-workout catalyst" protein shake, dumping my brain into my blog. I feel a little better. At least tomorrow it's supposed to rain. :)
I am so sorry sweetie. Is this your first deployment? One thing that might make life a little more fun, is to get a flip video camera and go do activities you can tape for him. It will be fun to be able to include him in your everyday life. Keep your chin up. Things are hard at first, but they will get easier. Talk to me any time you need. ;0)
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on the starting a family and wanting to make things for baby. I'm starting to get impatient. I hope that your day got better:)
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